http://www.myspace.com/kahoots / http://www.myspace.com/ninaviolet

The next day, I went to Vineyard Haven and found myself wandering into the middle of the Memorial Day picnic at the Waterworks, smiling and nodding while glancing down at my iPhone and looking for familiar landmarks based on the clues on the website. I found the cache excitedly, but realized I’d forgotten a pen. I wandered back to my car and found one. Another small cache, there was little room for anything but my signature. Another one was nearby, so I walked until I found it, up a hill on the overlook. A friend drove by, honking and waving as he passed, surely wondering “what the hell is he doing?” as I leaned over the guard rail to look behind it.

A huge log here, soaked but loaded with names and thanks, and a path tag, the same that my brother and I found months earlier but left in Edgartown. It was neat to see the same thing come back. I put a bugs bunny figurine inside and went on my way.

Now I was in a flow, and I decided to go back, quickly, as the sun began to set, to the location I’d attempted the night before. After much frustrated leaf kicking, I found it hidden next to a tree, further back than I’d thought it would be. An ammo box! I excitedly pulled it out and dug through it, finding all kinds of relics and a very comprehensive log book, dating back to 2003. I had no idea it had been going on so long. I filled out my piece, dropped in a bunch of goodies, and left, satisfied. I decided to give one more cache a shot, as the sun continued to set and the light was dimming, I lost myself in the woods of edgartown, down numerous dead end roads and avoiding private property signs. Finally, I found the right track, and then wandered along the beach until I found an alcove with a field, overhung by a canopy of trees. I entered and searched the area, consulting my GPS and tips all the while. Eventually, I found it buried next to a tree, another ammo box, this one filled with several tagged objects, tracker bugs, and so on. I snapped some photos and put a Metrocard inside. This little hobby was taking me to places I’d never seen on Martha’s Vineyard, and it was a very exciting prospect. The next day I purchased a Time Capsule at the thrift store to create my own in the near future. I took several photos, here are a few that highlight the experience, particularly the sunset on the beach. I only wish there were more on Martha’s Vineyard, but I’ll do my best to make that happen on my own.

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How would people get to work? What monstrosity is this? As a child I had fantasized about the book “cloudy with a chance of meatballs” coming true but this was a nightmare in front of my eyes. Upon looking more closely around the restaurant, several such horrors were present: churches with ice cream cones towering behind them, A town hall dwarfed by a grilled cheese sandwich. Good god, it was terrifying. Imagine your town, crushed by several pounds of meat and dairy, all cooked in lard. These poor people. I had to save them. I sprinted out the door to the nearest Walmart and gathered up supplies: Mr. Clean, a mop, and as many trash bags as I could carry. I sprinted toward the bridge waving the mop blindly in front of my face, like an amateur jouster, afraid to be hit and knocked from my horse. I swatted at the burger wildly with the wet end of the mop, trying to ignore the screams and whines of the bacon as the grease cutter sliced through it. The bun knocked me over a few times, but after an epic battle, the burger collapsed to the ground, defeated in a puddle of it’s own juices and melted cheese. I begrudgingly collected up the remains of the hideous beast, grease ruining my clothing, and dumped it into the trash bag.

Triumphant, I carried on. I stopped at a salon and borrowed 2 blow dryers that I then wielded like 6 shooters as I approached the ice cream cone. It attempted to drip into my mouth, but I resisted it’s temptations and fired upon it with impunity until it was nothing but a pink sticky mess on the pavement behind the town hall. Just then I heard a distant rumbling and a few moments later, the hill to the north was shadowed by onion rings, rolling downward toward me. I knew I was outmatched. As they crushed cars and knocked fire hydrants out of the sidewalk, sending jetstreams of water into the air. I retreated, meeting once again with my mother and shouting at her to start the car, drive, drive, before we’re all killed! We drove up the next hill and the onion rings lost momentum, collapsing upon themselves in greasy breaded messes. On the horizon I could see the french fries bursting from the pavement like fast growing trees, then crawling down the street as if they were caterpillars, eating the greenery as they went. These poor people. I did my best to save them, but I was overwhelmed, the food was too much, too prolific, too delicious and fattening. This poor town, off an exit in western Massachusetts, would have to fight this behemoth on their own. Good luck, brave souls.

And now, I’m off to watch my brother graduate.

In the midst of all this, after purchasing a bottle of water from a starbucks on the road, I decided to spend a portion of the ride taking “experimental” photographs of objects on the side of the road, and of myself. It’s only an iPhone camera, but it beats my last digital camera and has tons of storage space, so I am taking advantage of it. Anyway, one example of such a photograph appears here: a self portrait, taken through the bottle of water I bought. I found myself enjoying the various stretched effects that the bottle had on the camera, and the look of the water as it appeared to rise above the edges of the road. I took several photos that may end up in a gallery here soon. I know my updates have been sparse and far between lately, I plan to try to get back on task and post more often. I guess taking a vacation can sort of pull you away from the all important things, like updating your website, huh?

I hope the next iphone update actually has video, as is rumored, and that I can use it with my current phone, because I would really enjoy that.

I had to take the night off from my radio show this week, but I plan to return in full force next week.

Better luck next time, Internet Libertarians. Found on the Harvard Bridge in Boston.

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(Feel free to click the comment button and ask any questions you may have about the above images, he gave a pretty decent description of what they all were. Human scrimshaw, live black widows, Vampire slaying kits, etc.)

I informed the Professor about the woman with the invisible arm I’d read about on Boing Boing a few days prior.

This is certainly classy. Saw this in Oak Bluffs a couple hours ago.

Found this stuck on the back of an ATM sign in Edgartown. I can’t tell if it’s an endorsement or not. Can you?

Text Reads: “Stop messin’ with our boats and fix the ozone depleting traffic mess in menemsha and get me a usable cell signal while you’re at it. It’s the traffic, stupid!”

(It’s a tourist based island living joke, I guess)